IT’S YOUR ENTIRE FAULT!

Dear Students,

You know what; I’ve been too kind to all of you. Even though, you always blaming me why you get failed in your exams, I’m still willing to cooperate with your instructors. Is that my problem why you don’t get the exam? I’m just silently waiting for you I did not do anything but why you are crying? It seems that you want to tear me up. What should I do? Remember, I’m not the one who responsible to all of these questions. And if you look at it clearly, I’m just a victim here! I’m just your instructor’s instrument so that you can be a better person someday. Although, you hated me, you cannot do anything but to accept me and answer me. Whether you like it or not, you should and you must answer all the questions that were written to me.

            My dear students let me give you one important lesson that you must put in your mind so that, next time you will not blame me anymore. Study ahead of time, don’t be too lazy! Everything that was happening to you right now is your entire fault.

            Hopefully you will accept me already because my fault here is only I’m the one where you instructors put all the questions not the one who make your life miserable. Hopefully, you will love me and next time when we see each other again, instead of giving me a sad face you will already give me you sweet and smiling face, because I loved to see it.

`                                                                                                                       Yours truly,

Test Paper

BRAIN TWISTER CHALLENGE

ARRANGE THE FOLLOWING SCRAMBLED WORDS

Do you loved to solve puzzled games? Do you loved to twist your mind? Or do you loved to arrange words that are scramble? Well, if you do, then it’s your chance to answer the following words. Don’t you worry, all the words have a clue, so base on the clue, and you will now find or guess for the correct answer. It has three levels; easy level, difficult level and the brain twister level. So, are you ready to take the challenge? So if you are now ready, then let’s begin the brain twister challenge.

EASY LEVEL:

                EKRAB

CLUE:  you can form these four letters into one word, according to the dictionary; this word means to separate something into pieces.

                PLCEHNLEO

CLUE: you can form these nine letters into two words, it’s a modern gadget and commonly used by the teen-agers now a days, according to the dictionary that I consulted, this word means a portable telephone operated through cellular radio network.

                CARMLCOAKL

CLUE: you can form these ten letters into two words, people usually used this to avoid late records in the office or in the school, and in other words, this invention was made to wake the people.

DIFFICULT LEVEL:

                KWWRDAA

CLUE: you can form these seven letters into one word, this word means difficult or uncomfortable to use.

                CAUTTLA

CLUE: you can form these seven letters into one word; this word means to impart the sensation of contact.

                EDUGRG

CLUE: you can form these six letters into one word, this word means a feeling of resentment or ill, and usually it will last for a long time. This word also is a title of a horror film.

BRAIN TWISTER LEVEL:

                TONETLGIG

CLUE: you can form these nine letters into two words; this word is a sign of bravery and acceptance.

                OUJAELS

CLUE: you can form these seven letters into one word; this word is a sign of envy and bitterness.

            IIODT

CLUE: you can form these five letters into one word; this word is a sign of being senseless and being stupid.

BRAIN CHALLENGE

SOLVE THE CRIME, WHO’S THE KILLER?

I hope you are all good in solving crimes, now, let me measure how smart you are. In this brain challenge, I want you to solve the crime, and find the killer. If you do that, then you are good but if not, just try it again. This time I will not put the answers, it’s for you to find out who is the killer. Hope you like it. .

CRIME # 1

                In a house, there are 8 active people who interact with each other every day. One Sunday afternoon, the husband was murdered, as the police arrived at the house, they immediately do some investigation and they start to ask the remaining member of the family for further information about the crime, and this was they’re alibis.

Wife: I was at the kitchen, preparing for the snack.

Grandfather: I was at the garden, playing with my grandson.

Driver: I was at the post office to mail some letter.

Maid: I was at my room, looking for my money.

Grandmother: I was placing my clothes in the closet

Daughter: I was taking a bath.

After hearing all of their alibis, the police caught the killer. So, who’s the killer?

CRIME # 2

                A man was found dead inside of the elevator. Before the incident happened, there are 6 people have accompanied him in the elevator. Immediately, the management call the cops to investigate the incident. Then during the investigation, one of the cops saw a ball pen beside the dead body, then the cop ask the witness who were the people in the elevator that time and these were the names;

Cathy – marketing manager’s secretary

John- messenger

Bert- janitor

Felix – employee

Mary – employee

Rose – elevator girl

Upon knowing these names, the cops immediately caught the killer. So, who’s the killer?

CRIME # 3

                First day of school, there was a crime at the library, a student was killed using poisonous water inside the librarian room, and there was an investigation, Science teacher, English teacher, math teacher, guard and the janitor.

Science teacher – I was at the laboratory for experiment.

English teacher – I have a meeting that time.

Math teacher – I was doing a card for the final grade.

Guard – I was sleeping

Janitor – I was in the garden.

QUESTION: who is the killer?

After all, it’s Christmas

People are buying foods because it’s Christmas

People are celebrating because it’s Christmas

People are singing because it’s Christmas

And people are exchanging gift because it’s Christmas

People are quite and kind because it’s Christmas

People are very generous because it’s Christmas

People are so helpful because it’s Christmas

And people are smiling because it’s Christmas

Christmas is everyone’s favourite

Christmas is everyone’s don’t want to forget

Christmas is everyone’s want to celebrate

And Christmas is everyone’s time to exchange gifts

There are people who don’t have a food even if it’s Christmas

There are people who suffer a lot even if it’s Christmas

There are people crying even if it’s Christmas

And there are people hurting each other even if it’s Christmas

Christmas is Christmas after all

This is the time of sharing and love if we sum up it all

There are heartaches and broken relationships that we may encounter

But we should not forget that Christmas is here that we must celebrate

For some, Christmas suck

And there are some who said, Christmas is just f**k

Whatever the words that they want to define

Christmas is coming and let our happiness and love be shine

Have a merry Christmas to all of youJ

INEVITABLE (Suspense Short Story)

There was a college student in one of the university in United Kingdom who taking up psychology. In his thesis, he wants to know on whether there is really a third sex, or is there really a homosexual person. That’s why, he really find a way on how he could gather information about his topic, then on his way home, he saw a man standing in front of their house. Joshua (the name of the college student) was surprise, so he ask the man, “What are you doing here?” then the man turns his head and smiled “well, I’m looking for Joshua Saldic?”, “yeah, I’m Joshua Saldic, so what do you want from me?”. then Joshua open the door and let the man enter his house, then they continue talking “Do you have a blog?” the man ask, “Yeah! Why?”, “my boss, accidentally saw your blog, and he is interested about your thesis, and the reason why I’m here is to give you a financial support to pursue your thesis”, Joshua feels happy but at the same time worried because he even don’t know the man talking in front of him but since this is the thesis that Joshua really wants, he now then give the man the overview of his work and the budget of the said thesis, after a while, the man, calls his boss then give the money to Joshua,  before the man leaves, he told Joshua “If you need something,  or more feel free to call me, and by the way, here’s my calling card” then Joshua accept the calling card.

                To gather information about the said thesis, Joshua needs a people who will be his subject so, he call and ask the man, that he needs a real guy (what Joshua means is that, he really need a man not a gay) then after that, Joshua ask a house that his subject will be living with, because Joshua was planning to keep his subject close to him and record every possible behaviour that the guy will act during the whole process. After a week, then man calls Joshua that everything is set and he just wait for Joshua to visit the house and prepare everything. Then Joshua quickly visits the house and set everything like the cameras, the video tape, and many other things. After he finishes everything, the man calls Joshua again for him to be able to meet his subject, and since then he already met Kevin. Kevin is also a college student, and because Kevin also needs a financial support, he takes the invitation for him to have money for his tuition. Well, Kevin is handsome, and has a physically fit body, he is tall and very masculine, and so Joshua thinks that Kevin is a perfect subject. Then after the briefing of what will Kevin do inside the house, finally the test is already begun.

                On the first day of Kevin inside the house, he notices that everything was good, the foods are ready, and the beddings are ready and even the bathroom. Before Kevin enter the house, Joshua told him that there are camera in living room, kitchen, dining room and even to the bedroom but Joshua emphasize that the bathroom and some other place in the house that are considered as so private have no camera that’s why Kevin feels comfortable, and Joshua added that he’s the only one who will be seeing Kevin, so for Kevin there’s nothing to worry about.  One day after, Joshua record all the basic behaviour that Kevin shows inside the house, like sleeping, eating, exercising and watching television. On the second day, Joshua slowly noticed that Kevin already do something unusual like talking to himself and masturbating. Then on the third day, Joshua secretly hide the sex video in the living room for Kevin to watch, so when Kevin already wake up and eat his breakfast, he notices a box so as he opened it, he immediately gives a smile to the camera, because the content of that box are all pornographic videos, but Kevin did not know that, it was a gay sex video, so as Kevin watch it, he was surprise because he is not used to watch gay sex video but after sometime, he already learned to love it.

                Libido is now slowly taking over Kevin; he starts to feels aroused so what he did is that, he went to the bathroom and take some time to release his hot feeling.  Then Joshua wrote to his data sheet, “no one can stop libido, whether you’re a female or male or homosexual, as long as you can see people having sex you will be carried away”. and on the fourth day of the test, Kevin feels that there is something wrong, so he went in front of the camera and he told Joshua that he needs a person whom he can talk to, so Joshua immediately knock at the door and have some talking session to Kevin. Then Joshua found out that Kevin was now under the gender curiosity, so Joshua told Kevin that he is a man and he still love to get mingle with girls, then Joshua decided to leave. After the sixth day, Joshua was starting to get curious of the things that Kevin do inside the house, that’s why he decided to let Kevin be out of the test and since Joshua already gather information.

                Joshua’s next subject is a homosexual, or what they called as “gay”, the same process but this time, Joshua let Arthur (the gay’s name) to see a both female having sex, so even Arthur was a gay the libido still take over his mind and body, then he told Joshua, “I think from now on, I will already love to have sex with girls”, so Joshua’s theory about gender is finally clear. Then Joshua’s next subject is a lesbian, same process, but this time he let the lesbian to see a man to man sex, then the lesbian told Joshua that she now open to have a relationship with a guy. All of the first three subjects have the same length of days staying at the house but except from this last subject that Joshua pick, she’s really a girl, so sweet and so charming, that’s why Joshua feels in love with her, so Joshua takes the same process except from letting the woman watch a sex video. The woman stay for almost two weeks, then three day before Joshua let the woman be free, he notices that the woman is now doing some insane things like cutting his own hair, talking to the things inside the house and many other. And since Joshua was worried about the woman, he decided to enter the house comfort Louisa (the name of the woman). Joshua stay a night in the house and yes, they do sex. When the morning comes, Joshua was surprised because Louisa is about to cut his risk, so Joshua tried to stop her but Louisa run to the kitchen and when she came back, she already holding a knife and she wants to kill Joshua. Joshua tried to run to the bathroom but Louisa block the way, so Joshua decided to outside the room, then he hide from Louisa. “Joshua, Joshua, where are you?” said Louisa, Joshua was hiding at the cabinet that was place in the kitchen, Louisa are scratching the tiles and really wants to find and kill Joshua. Then suddenly, Joshua received a call, “help me!” Joshua whispered, “Joshua! You need to get Louisa out of that house, she’s insane!” then the door of the cabinet opened, “why you are hiding?!!” then Louisa stab Joshua but Joshua kick her then Louisa fell from the ground. Joshua run but he was beaten by Louisa then he fell, Joshua are trying to get out, he crawls and crawls then he finally reach the living room, he try to walk and open the door but he didn’t know that Louisa was on his back, so she stab him, luckily, Joshua hold Louisa and be able to get the knife, then Joshua stab Louisa on her chest that makes Louisa died.

                Then after a week, Joshua finally presents his study and people where really impressed to his work, they are all clapping and give Joshua a standing ovation, so Joshua feels so happy and he look every people in that hall, but he noticed that there is a man standing in the corner of the hall and seems that he don’t like the work of Joshua. So after his defend, Joshua tries to meet that man but unluckily, he was already gone,  Joshua still remember the wardrobe of the man, she was wearing a black pants, and black jacket, he was trying to hide his face. But since there are many people want to congratulate him, Joshua ignored the man. Then after a while, Joshua heard his phone ringing so he got the call, “hello this is Joshua”, “why you killed her?!!” , Joshua was surprise “who is this?”, “it doesn’t matter on who is the hell talking to you, what I’m concerned is, why you killed her?!” “it was an accident, I don’t want to kill her but. . .” “But what?” “but . . .it is inevitable,” “huh? Inevitable? Are you kidding? She could not be killed if you didn’t killed her!”, then Joshua off his phone. Joshua feels so nervous and worried, but he try to conquer it and try to give a smile to those people who congratulates him. And on his way home, it was 7:00 o’clock in the evening, Joshua hears that there is someone following him, so he run and he walk very fast, after he reach his house, he immediately lock the door, then he look at check if there is really a man who wants to kill him, then he was surprise because the man is standing in front of his door while holding the knife that he used to kill Louisa then he slowly step back, when he turn his head. . .”AHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

TO BE CONTINUED. . .

The Simbang Gabi Love Story

(Kwentula ni: Orlan Doromal Tabuada Jr.)

Sa tuwing sasapit na ang Disyembre

Hindi ko mapigilang magsaya at ngumiti

Sapagka’t Simbang Gabi na naman

At mabubusog na naman itong matakaw kung tiyan.

Eto talaga ang gusto ko tuwing pasko

Ang maraming pagkain tulad ng bibingka at puto

Kaso nga lang parang merong akong hinahanap

Isang babae na aking mayayakap

Kaya nga, isang araw, may nakasabay akong magandang dalaga

Na talagang, nakakaloko ang beauty niya

Kaya naman, humanap ako ng paraan para makatabi ko siya

Kaya nga lang, ang malas ko, dahil umiba sila ng upuan ng kapatid niya

Inabangan ko siya sa labas ng simbahan

Para naman, makilala ko siya ng lubusan

Kaso nga lang, hindi ko na siya nakita

Baka naman, meron na sa kanya’y kumuha?

Hindi ako nawalan ng pag-asa

Kinabukasan, ay inabangan ko uli siya

Sa wakas! Siya’y narin aking nakita

Kaso nga lang, parang kasama ata ang kuya niya?

Sa panglawang pagkakataon, ako’y umatras

Sapagkat, talagang mahirap

Wrong timing palagi ang aking mga plano

Sana naman bukas, ay mag-isa nalang siya, O’ Diyos ko!

Siguro’y narinig ng Diyos ang aking panalangin

Dahil sa wakas ay mag-isa nalang siyang nanalangin

Kaya naman, hindi ko na inubos ang oras ko sa kakatingin sa kanya

Agad-agad ko siyang nilapitan at kinuha yung number niya

Ang saya-saya ko sa aking nagawa

Dahil sa wakas ay nakausap ko na rin

Yung babae sa aking panalangin

Sana nga lang ay single pa siya, at ready ng makipag mingle

Tinanong ko siya, kung okay lang manligaw sa kanya

Tiningnan lang niya ako at sabay sabing “parang hindi ko pa ata kaya”

Tapos nalaman ko na kabe-break lang pala niya

Sa ex-boyfriend niya, na ayon sa kanya, minahal talaga niya ng sobra.

Ako’y napaupo at napa-isip

Kung ipagpatuloy ko ba o wag na muna

Baka kasi masamain niya

At sabihan pa akong “manhid ka ba?”

Sa bawat simba na kami ang magkasama

Sa bawat hawak ng kamay pag nagsisimula na ang kanta

At sa bawat ngiti na ibinibigay niya

Para bang malalag-lag na puso ko sa kanya

Malapit ng matapos ang simbang gabi

Hindi ko parin sa kanya masabi

Kung anong tunay kung nararamdaman

At kung ano ang sigaw ng puso kung luhaan.

Sa wakas at December 24 na

Handing-handa na akong ipagtapat sa kanya

May dala pa akong bulaklak at tsokolate

Para naman masabi niya, nag effort talaga ang torpe

Habang siya’y papunta ng simbahan

Hindi ko sa kanya pinaalam

Na ako’y nasa kanya lamang likuran

Habang hawak-hawak ang ibinigay kung laruan

Ng nakaabot na siya sa may simbahan

May nakita akong lalaki sa may gasolinahan

Parang may iniintay siya

Sana naman, hindi yung babaeng liligawan ko pa

Nabitawan ko ang rosas kung dala

Dahil, nakita kung yakap-yakap niya

Ang lalaki na aking sinasabi

At holding hands pa sila sa may tabi

Umiyak ako at umuwi

Dahil pakiramdam ko’y, sinaktan niya ako ng paulit-ulit

Tinawagan niya ako at tinetext pa

Kaya naglakas loob akong magpakita sa kanya

Habang siya’y paparating

Ka holding hands yung lalaki sa dilim

Pinipigian  ko ang akins sarili

Baka kasi masuntok ko yung lalaki

“I would like you to meet my cousin” ang sabi niya

Na shock ako at napailing pa

“akala ko’y boyfriend mo siya?”

At nagtawanan nalang sila

Itinuloy ko ang aking balak

At bumili ako ulit ng mga bulaklak

Ngayon ay girlfriend ko na siya

At ang saya-saya talaga

Nagpapasalamat ako dahil may simbang gabi

At nakita ko naring ang babae na gusto kung makatabi

And I really feel so happy

And it’s all because of the simbang gabi love story.

T.F.D (The Filipino Diaspora)

(Tula ni: Orlan Doromal Tabuada Jr.)

Bago pa ako magsimula sa tula kung ito

Nais ko lang sabihin sa makakbasa nito

Na ang hangarin ko’y mapasaya lamang kayo

At ayokong magkaroon ng conflict dahil ditto.

Ako’y magsisimula na

At ihanda niyo na ang inyong bibig sa pagbasa

Pagka’t eto na ang mga kaibigan ko sa TFD

O ang tinatawag naming, The Filipino Diaspora

-NESTOR DE PAZ-

Nestor De Paz ang kanyang FB name

At hindi ko inaasahang siya ay magaling

Magaling, mambola at magpatawa

Kaya naman, sa palagay ko, swerte ang kanyang pamilya

-SITTIE CATES-

Siya ay si Sittie Cates

Isang maganda at siguro’y mabait

Kaso nga lang ako’y nagtataka

Eh kasi, parang mas gusto pa niya sa gabi maghanap ng makakachika?

-Brewed Coffee-

Uy! Eto na si Brewed Coffee

For sure nakuha niya ang kanyang pangalan sa isang kape

Sana lang ay hindi siya mapait

Siguro naman ay hindi dahil nanay na nanay siya sa amin kahit kami ay makulit

-Bling Triond-

Eton ang artistahing naming kaibigan

At ang sabi niya, Bling Triond daw ang kanyang pangalan

Kaya naman madaming TFD members’ ang nagkakacrush sa kanya

Kahit nga si Marie ay kinikilig sa kanya

-MARIE TFD-

Ang pangalan niya ay Marie

Conscious na conscious sa kanyang body

Siguro siya talaga ay nagpapaganda

Para mapansin siya ng crush niya (Biro langJ)

-Donald Pagulong-

Donald Pagulong ang kanyang tunay na pangalan

Papaleng naman ang tawag ng kanyang mga kaibigan

Father na father talaga ang turing naming sa kanya

Kaya naman naiintindihan naming kung minsan ay wala siya

-Bobie Cayao-

Bobie, Bobie, Bobie

Parang kang tutubi

Kasi minsan kalang naming mahuli

At minsan lang din makatambay sa TFD

-Franklin Vios-

Ikaw naman pareng Franklin

Ang apelyido mo ay mamahalin

Sana naman ay mas makilala pa kita

Para marami pa akong maisulat sinta.

-JC Pineda-

Narito na sa wakas si pareng JC Pineda

Na minsan na kaming pinag-alala

Dahil sa sakit na kanyang dinadala

At ngayon na ayos na siya, nagpapasalamat kami sa Diyos ng bonggang-bongga.

-Elyson Encarnacion-

Hello sayo pareng Elyson

Sana’y hindi mo ito mabasa ngayon

Sapagkat ako’y nahihirapan na

At nauubusan na ng maisulat di tulad ng iba.

-Macherie TFD-

Meron pa pala akong e-hahabol

Macherie TFD na sa kanya’y aming call

Siya ay maganda at talagang successful na

Pagdating sa kanyang blog na talagang maganda katulad niya.

Kaya naman, ako’y humihingi ng tawad

Para sa mga taong nakalimutan kung maisulat

Talagang sorry sa inyo

Dahil hanggang ditto nalang talaga ang tula kung ito.

Sana’y nagustuhan niyo. . .